


What Makes it Easier

by dameserdaigle



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-13
Updated: 2015-04-13
Packaged: 2018-03-22 18:17:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3738580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dameserdaigle/pseuds/dameserdaigle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Designing and preparing bombs was one thing... Seeing what they did was another. And realizing just how it affected people? Well, no one had ever helped Peridot learn how to deal with that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Makes it Easier

**Author's Note:**

> Alternate universe, gems are humans.

“I always take a souvenir.” Jasper waved the little rag doll in front of Peridot’s face in order to distract her from the carnage around them. For a moment, green eyes followed the doll, but she broke away once she realized that the skirt _wasn’t_ red, that it was _bloodstained_. Just like the entire landscape in front of them was. Inside her cold exterior, she was screaming. All she had done was routed the bomb. She didn’t want to see what it had _done_.

There was a disgruntled grunt from Jasper, drawing Peridot’s gaze again. “Just do your status checks. And be quick about it.” She watched the doll as it was tossed up and caught again. Its head snapped in the air and Peridot couldn’t help but to think about how if Jasper had done that to a human, their neck would have broken. She wondered when her sense of humor had gone from droll and sarcastic to morbid.

“I’m serious about the souvenir.” Peridot sighed, closing her eyes for a moment. But Jasper’s voice was more gentle than usual – and she hadn’t thought gentle Jasper to even be a possibility. “It makes it easier.”

Silently, she watched the commander turn and go back into the plane. Silently, she pulled out her tablet, rubbing absently at a fingerprint in the corner that was too big to be hers and mentally chiding Jasper to _stop touching her shit_ , even though she knew that she had forgotten to charge it the night before out of nerves and the commander was just trying to help. And for one final long, silent moment, she surveyed the area, the broken buildings, the shattered glass, the blood that appeared random places, staining the very earth with silence when mere hours before there had been screaming. She wondered if screaming would have been easier to deal with.

She cleared her throat and started to walk, pulling up the data sheet on the tablet. “Log date: July 18, 2035. Location: Sector 12. This is Peridot, performing test bomb status check. Initiating Area 1 scan.”

Setting down the first scanning robot, she moved in a circle, initiating the scans in all six areas. She sat down in the middle of them, tapping appropriate boxes on her data sheet as each robot reported its finding.

“Area 1, no signs of life. Area 2, no signs of life. Area 3, Felis catus detected. Area 4, no signs of life. Area 5, no signs of life. Area 6…” Peridot paused, hand hovering over her tablet, staring at the robot’s data screen. Without thinking, she grabbed a rock and smashed the robot with it, getting to her feet. “No signs of life,” she reported, voice even. But she was already walking into Area 6, the results burned in her mind. Homo sapien detected.

And there she was. Somehow, the rubble that had once been a house had fallen in such a way that it didn’t crush her, but covered her, protecting her from the worst of the heat, so that her burns were surprisingly minor. Peridot couldn’t help but stare at the blonde girl, whose blue dress was tattered, blood staining her forehead and hair from a cut on her head.

She didn’t even think before picking her up and heading back to the ship.

 

Jasper wanted to put her in the dungeon. Peridot locked her in her own bedroom instead, glaring at the commander. It wasn’t like she could escape the base anyway.

“I swear, Peridot, you better not turn your back on that girl… She will end up in the dungeon, I can promise you that.”

“Don’t fucking touch my stuff, Jasper.”

And that was the end of that. Peridot learned that the girl didn’t speak much, just stared into space. She was prone to fits of rage, throwing things around and screaming, then collapsing into sobs. It was a lot to deal with. But she kept bringing her food, kept asking her questions.

“What’s your name? Mine is Peridot.”

The answer was apparently a glare. But when she went to take the plate away, “Lapis” was spelled out in the peas.

Lapis was a strange, sad girl. The only time she smiled was when she was taking a bath – which Peridot only found out because of a couple accidents. Sometimes she would stare out the window for hours on end, just staring at the sky. On a whim, Peridot bought her a betta fish, and found that she would speak to that freely. If Peridot stood behind the door, she could hear that beautiful voice, whispering to the fish about how someday she wouldn’t be a prisoner anymore. And it made Peridot hurt.

Once, she walked in on Lapis crying. On a whim, she decided to do what normal people did, going over and putting an arm around her. She winced at the stiffening that resulted, but persisted, running her fingers through her hair.

“You’ll be okay… I’m keeping you safe. You’ll be okay.”

And, ever so slowly, Lapis curled into her, until her arms wrapped around Peridot’s waist and her face found her shoulder and the tears were running down her arm but it didn’t matter because after that moment, Lapis spoke to her. She smiled at her. Every now and again, she would hear her laugh. And sometimes, Peridot could convince herself that her little blue girl was happy.

But she wasn’t. The nightmares would come and she would wake up, screaming for someone called Pearl. At first, Peridot was jealous. Why would her Lapis call for someone that wasn’t her? When she thought to ask, and found out that Pearl was her girl’s older sister… Guilt was too gentle a world. The bomb that she had dropped had taken away someone else’s sister.

And that’s when she decided to take the plane for a ride. Lapis flitted from window to window, looking so excited to be outside of the base. She pointed out every little thing they passed as Peridot flew, and she pretended to be annoyed, snapping “Lapis, I’m trying _not to crash_.” But her excitement was infectious. If only it didn’t also hurt.

Her Lapis loved the water so much, so she took her to the ocean. They stood on the beach for a while. Well, Peridot stood as Lapis chased the waves, laughing and trying to splash the water hard enough that it would get Peridot wet. When she was sufficiently distracted, Peridot took a deep breath and headed back to the plane.

“Peri!” She paused and tried not to curse as she turned, glancing back at the girl running after her, frowning. “Where are you going?”

“Back to the base. You’re free now.” For some reason, Peridot hadn’t expected the horrified, crushed expression on her precious girl’s face.

“Don’t… Don’t you leave me too.”

“But you’re free now. You’re not a prisoner. You can be happy.”

Peridot had never expected to be kissed. At least, not like this, arms locking around her neck, pulling her down into something that was desperate and yet somehow still sweet. She hadn’t expected it to come from a beautiful girl who cried with all the pain of the whole world. But she knew it was right.

 

The base was happier with fish bowls everywhere. It was happier with Lapis’ laughter echoing down the halls as she ran from Jasper – but really, what grown adult really fell for the “got your nose” trick? And before Jasper could even teasingly grab her girl, Peridot was there to remind her. Don’t touch her stuff.

It was a weird kind of home. But Peridot guessed that it worked. Or something of the sort.


End file.
